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Dating always initiating contact

Say you got a brother. So by giving women equality, they have been taken off the symbolic pedestal. And this is the problem. Men have been bashed for 40 years to change and most have. Of course a lot of them seem frustrated by what women say they should get and then seeing this contradiction i have exposed earlier. Crayven, thanks for sharing your perspective about fairness equality with men and women when it comes to love. If everyone lived by one meaning of fairness, love and life would be simplified and easier.

If people could get past fairness equality and have compassion, be open and vulnerable with each other as to what they want, more people would be getting the love they desire. Feminists are in a challenging situation as they have been rewarded in their professional lives for initiating, taking charge and controlling tihngs. Yet taking this same approach in their love lives tends to push men and love away.

She never initiaties text conversations, what's the deal? - RedEye Chicago

While these women come across as strong and independent, many still long for old-fashioned romance. I appreciate your perspective about love and many individuals share this perspective. My perspective is different — I think love is not about putting someone you admire above you. When putting someone above, it makes things unbalanced and the disparity grows between both people.

I think love is about loving yourself first and sharing that love with someone else. When both people love themselves first, the love they share is healthier and more equal. Thank you so much for sharing your viewpoints. I really appreciate the time and care you took to do so. I had a discussion with some women on Jezebel a supposedly VERY pro-equality site and all, and i mean ALL women there were horrified when i told them that according to equality women and men should split the bill, split the gas cost, everything. And so we got a problem. Spoken like a wise woman.

For women exuding masculine energy is the fastest way to unbalance the Chemical equation. Lenny, thanks so much for sharing your thoughts about this post. You bring up a good point about women exuding masculine energy as a way to unbalance the chemical equation. The beauty of courtship is that the chemical equation is balanced. It is talking about natural instincts.

Why are we so worried or distraught when someone suggests and rightfully that there are natural female traits and natural male ones? Nice rationalizationing of your own privilege there. Yes the article does not say anything about equality, I am. Crayven, oooh, you sound bitter. I suggest a date.


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It shows you have valid arguments so you proceed to insult. Equality and female dating privilege are incompatible. One of them must go, and for both genders it would be beneficial that this entitled attitude should go. If you like him for his posessions then i got some bad news about your character. Meanwhile they are fat as a tub and have the personality of a paper bag. Hypocrisy is the word. I agree that women should work outside the home. You will get no arguments from me about that. However, that is not the issue here. More and more men are refusing the old laws.

Are you the moral police now? First of all this is a systemic problem. Also why do i have to choose?

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Your thinking is exactly the problem. Women and men can choose to live any way they like. Seems illogical to me. And so do women…they wil continue to choose the man they think is superior over the ones they think are inferior. Interesting exchange between An aggressive bitter guy cloaking his Bitterness with rationality and a passive aggressive manipulator who defers to Instinct the way things are To try to prove her points, and this infuriates the angry rationalist!! Quite entertaining Bottom line is every human being is completely different and a strict dating style or sticking to hard rules will not work with Everyone.

And neither will pounding your fist and demanding complete logic and equity in the mating dance. Watching the two extreme mindsets clash here was fun. Thanks for stopping by and letting us know your thoughts about the exchange with viewpoints that others have shared. Have a wonderful day! I see your pt. If only the men who choose to whine, argue and fret over all of these things instead of enjoying themselves and having fun knew how unnattactive It made them feel to the majority of high quality Women they would probably quit all their damn scorekeeping, and they might even get lucky but I think they would rather be Right Than score ha ha ha.

Lighten up guys dating should be fun!! Why antogonize this guy. So what if he is bitter he deserves understanding and compassion not the latter because more than likely he was used by someone else. Listening equality and such. Why argue against that then cite nature. I think there are many women who take on the role of the initiator, maybe without even realizing it.. But then, how do they really know unless both sides get a chance to take charge of the relationship?

The weird thing was…after the woman claimed that her boyfriend would never be the one to call first or to think of something for them to do, or even to initiate sex, her cell phone rang. Guess who it was. Anyway, it was kind of funny that after all of the insistence about how he would never take charge, he called her. But I guess the only way to find out is to step back and let him do the pursuing.

Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. I tend to lean toward your initial instincts. But remember, with every rule, there are exceptions. Backing off, I suppose, can help to send the relationship in a better direction. However, for the most part, it does suggest game playing. I would much prefer a woman to be straight and direct, work with me to improve the relationship, rather than opt for this seemingly passive-agressive option.

Early in a relationship I like to be the one who is being pursued, mainly because I think that it is a good indication of how much a man values you. CleuXFour — Thanks so much for stopping by! I tend to shy away from anything that involves game playing. But I think there is something to be said for the balance of power in a relationship. Yet guys I cared less about would hear from me all the time. So please don't think your gf's aren't in love with you because they make you do all the calling.

Or text, or email. This question is not for you. Or apparently now, judging by the quote even if you do make this contact, you still might not care about the guy at all. Let's say first month or 2. Is it a fear of rejection?

You want to be pursued? You were just taught not to call a man, or read a book saying that? You want to see just how interested he really is? You do not want to appear to be "too easy? Or any other random reason? I ask because this is confusing and frustrating for many men. They date five girls in a row that do call, then come across one that does not. So, logically they think perhaps this new one is dating others, not as interested, too busy, etc.


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If dating a few women, often times you choose the one that is easiest to communicate with. And then when asking for advice about the above type of woman, men will say "have a back up plan.. Ball is in her court! If she doesn't she isn't that interested! Share Share this post on Digg Del. I will never understand it either, and I'm a chick. If I'm interested in you, you will definitely hear from me It makes no sense to act the opposite of your feelings. Especially since guys generally suck at reading subtle clues and all that stuff.

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You sometimes have to literally spell it out for them. I hardly initiate contact at all and because I like to get a feel of his level of interest in me I'm reciprocating my interest to him, everytime I pick up his call or reply to his text. If he's calling regular and consistantly over a period of a month, then I will begin to initiate the odd call and text You need to break this down more.

Is it during the dating process or the first part of an exclusive, committed relationship? The two aren't synonymous.